Back in the day, I was retarded - Repost from sometime in 2011

I very much need to get some homework done tonight so today's blog will quite short. In keeping up with weird stories from my life, we shall be going quite far back in time. When I was about three years old, my Mother thought I might be retarded. This is because I did not speak much. If you know me now, you probably know this hasn't changed all that much. Unless I am in the mood or the conversation is particularly interesting I generally prefer to listen to people speak then to speak myself. When I was three my mother had just began dating again after her divorce from my father. For whatever reason, she was taking me along with her on one of these dates. On the way to the car my mother was warning her date, who would a year later would become my step-dad, that she was worried that I was slow and that I didn't really speak. Upon arriving at the car my mother was about to load me into my car seat when I told her "its ok mom, Pat can put me in the car". I'm not sure if this was an early fuck you to my mom for thinking I was retarded, but the fact that I had not only spoke but had put together an entire sentence seemed to clear up the fact that I was in fact quite normal and just chose not to speak of my own accord. Well I guess I'm not sure if that really made me a normal three year old, but you know what I mean. So point being, I have been weird from birth so don't ever expect anything less of me.