Probably the most bizarre thing to ever happen in a bathroom - Repost from sometime in 2011

Ok so I don't have a clue how this came up in a conversation, but it recently did while at Norms with Erik. After hearing this story he said I needed to blog this because it was the best story I have every told him. So heads up, this is a gross story and if you don't want to hear about stuff that normally occurs in a bathroom then you should probably stop reading now. <br /><br />Pretty much exactly a year ago, during finals at CSUF, I was with Meghan, Kennifer, Lourdes, and I believe Christen was there, although he may have actually shown up later. The girls were pulling an all nighter in the Anthro Lab in MH (if you are not a Fullerton student or alum that is a particular building on campus, one I had many classes in). The lab was normally locked at night, but they got a professor to let them stay over night to finish some projects. I was there because, well I'm up over night anyway so why not do my homework in the company of people and get to feel like a normal person for a while. So a couple of hours go by and its probably around midnight, the building was dead quiet. So I'm sitting there doing my homework and out of nowhere I suddenly and violently have to shit. I don't know if it was what I ate or whatever, but it came out of nowhere and had to be handled immediately. Well random fact about me, I generally can not shit in a public restroom, this has since changed in part due to the following experience, and I definitely can not shit with someone in the restroom with me. Well it's midnight in what seems to be a pretty empty building, so although I was worried I would not make it to the restroom in time I was contented figuring I would have the restroom all to myself. So I cautiously make it down the three hallways to the restroom, it felt like an eternity but as I opened the door I could feel the success of not shitting myself en route. So I pick a side stall out of habit mostly, but also just in case someone were to come in they would have the obvious option of not picking the stall next to me. As I get in, put down a toilet seat cover and sit down the outside door opens. <br /><br />So now i'm sitting in the bathroom questioning my ability to hold it until the girl finishes. As I'm pondering this, what seems life altering decision, the girl takes the stall next to me. So now of course I'm forced to hold it, which is not such at easy task especially when sitting on a toilet. But I figure she will pee and be done in a minute, so I can finally do what I needed to do. But 30 seconds go by and the room is still silent. At this point I'm starting to sweat from the pain and uncomfortableness of my situation. I start reading the weird shit written on the stalls to distract myself, another minute goes by. And I start to hear this noise from the stall next to me, this repetitive motion of a noise. So I lean in closer to determine what it is that I am hearing. It takes a few seconds but I start to put it all together, when I start to hear the pattern of her breathing. The woman in the stall next to me is fucking MASTURBATING. It was at this point that I panic. What do you do in this situation. Do I get up and find another bathroom, give the girl some privacy. Wait, why the fuck did she pick the stall right next to mine knowing this was what she was going to be doing. Better yet who the fuck masturbates at school at midnight in a creepy restroom. What the fuck was going on. So I decided that I could not risk trying to make it to another restroom, and that the situation was beyond bizarre, so I shit while the girl in the stall next to me was getting off. It was loud and unpleasant and although at first i felt awkward about it, as my body began to feel better the better I felt about my decision. I hope she felt fucking awkward in her stall because I sure as hell felt awkward in mine. I finished, washed my hands and once I got out of the restroom I ran down the hallway in hopes of not seeing who it was that was next to me. When I got back to the room I was relieved to find that everyone was still there, and no one I knew would do such a thing. But the horror on my face was obvious and Meghan was soon asking me what happened. I don't think I had it in me to recount that story for a couple of hours, but by the time I did it was already hilarious.